My client, Sam, is a critical thinker with a scientist’s approach to the world. His go-to strategy is to ask challenging questions, poke holes, and play the devil’s advocate. This approach isn't something he’s necessarily honed or crafted; it’s simply his natural style and the way he feels most comfortable interacting with the world. For the most part, this method has been useful in his field, where he has exposed errors in thinking and caught potentially expensive business mistakes. As a new team leader, however, Sam’s critical approach has sometimes been met with frustration and confusion. His team wonders, "Whose side are you on, anyway?" Sam has been surprised to find that his default setting isn’t working as well as it used to!
When it comes to our computers, phones, and other technology, the "default" is the preset or standard configuration of the device—what you start with before making any changes or customizations. Similarly, as humans, we have our default settings—the ways we naturally and instinctively show up in situations, make decisions, handle conflict, and so on. These default settings are underpinned by our personality and girded by our deepest beliefs, emerging unbidden and rather automatically. For instance, some people naturally see the glass as half empty, while others see it as half full. Some, like Sam, approach all situations with a critical eye and challenging questions, whilst others lead with encouragement and support. Some are inclined to give people the benefit of the doubt while others don’t suffer fools gladly. There are those who trust but verify versus those who trust blindly; those who jump into immediately fix and solve versus listen and coach. The question is, do you know who you are? What are your default settings and are they right or wrong?
As with many behaviors in organizations, there isn’t usually a ‘right’ or ‘wrong’ answer—success depends on the alignment between our behaviors and the situation or context. Emerging leaders (as well as their more senior counterparts!) often encounter trouble when their tried-and-true defaults no longer work as effectively as they once did. This is most likely to occur when a change in role, circumstances, or situation demands a different or more nuanced mode of operating. Default settings result in behavior that feels most natural to us, but relying on them is akin to the luck of the draw—we might get it right some of the time, but probably not as frequently as we’d like.
One of my main jobs as a coach is to help individuals make more conscious and deliberate choices around their behavior—to bring their default settings into the light so we can understand how they naturally operate and assess their effectiveness. We then unpack the given situation and stakeholders to determine what response, style, or approach is likely to work best and what steps can be taken to prepare for this approach in action.
To better understand and challenge your default settings, ask these questions:
- What default settings do you have when it comes to leading others? Making decisions? Engaging with others? Getting things done?
- Are your default behaviors aligned with and reflective of your values?
- Are they effective in your current context and with your current stakeholders?
- Are you operating on default settings that are no longer serving you?
